Knowing the Father

I recently realized that I don't know the Father as I would like to, I have a different functional view of Him than Jesus. Since my dad committed suicide when I was 6 years old, I have been longing for a father and only my Heavenly Father can fill this place. Fathers give perspective in life, lend wisdom and guidance, protect, provide strength, commitment, encourage growth, and stability to a family. There are times I am painfully aware of the emptiness that I perceived a father would have filled, yet I know that my desire can really only be filled by the perfect Father. As I hear so many clients and friends talk about their fathers, I realize that the place in my heart that desires a father can't possibly be filled by a human. I am in the unique place, out of a desperate need, to come to know the Father in an intimate way. I have already learned that the Father's Kingdom, unlike this world, is one of an abundance of love, provision, forgiveness, and hope. There is enough in the Father's Kingdom for everyone who will receive His gifts of grace and love. I know these things as I have read about His Kingdom and at times I have experienced these, yet an intimate relationship is through experience. This is in such contrast to my earthly father's influence, which included rejection, abandonment, absence, emptiness, loneliness, poverty, fear, and a lack of joy. When I look at what I experienced growing up this seems to fit more of the Enemy's influence (the father of Lies), than the influence of the One True Heavenly Father. Since Jesus is the perfect representation of the Father, we see that everywhere Jesus went He brought the Kingdom of His Father which was a realm of grace, acceptance, love, peace, faith, joy, and freedom. Jesus did not bring fear where He went except to those who had more investment in the kingdom of this world (religious or political). Also something very uncomfortable about the Father displayed in Jesus is that He was willing for those around Him to be exposed. Jesus calls out those who are around Him, not for the purpose of embarrassment but for restoration. It seems that the only way to heal is go through the painful experience of exposure and being vulnerable. The rich young ruler gets exposed, the Pharisees are exposed, the woman at the well is exposed, the woman caught in adultery is exposed, and Peter in the midst of his pride and fear is exposed. It seems that this Father is not looking for nice facades but authentic faith which comes by encountering His grace in the most wounded places of our hearts. Religion hides wounds behind right behavior, rules, and appearances of righteousness. If we believe that Jesus is the perfect expression of the Father, then we have a Father who's love exposes to heal. This is scary if our earthly father exposed us to shame us, to make himself look good, or allowed us to stay hidden because this is how he lived his life. I also see that the Father is the one who lovingly oversees our growth and transformation into the likeness of Christ. This is a new adventure for me even though the Lord has been birthing this desire deep in my heart to truly know the Father intimately. Being in ministry and also being raised in a female dominated household, I find partnering with the Holy Spirit more natural. The Holy Spirit like the wind is not predictable, yet like the wind brings about change. Do you know the Father as Abba or does He seem distant, disconnected, angry, or overbearing? Maybe the Holy Spirit is leading you to an introduction of the Father?

In His Love,
Bret