Healing for Families

If you have been in a family you have been disappointed, hurt, rejected, or misunderstood. If not in your current family than the family you came from. It seems to experience these things is as human as breathing. No where in Scripture do I see a promise of an easy life, a life that is blessed does not necessarily mean easy. In my own journey with the Lord I have found that I have, at times, carried many of these painful experiences of family. I believe the reason we carry these things is because we are looking for some validation that the hurt, sadness, or disappointment is real. Self-comfort is deceptive because it keeps us stuck and can lead to self-pity and dispair. The Lord recently pointed me to a passage in Isaiah 53:4 in which it says that Jesus has borne our griefs, carried our sorrows, and pains but the error that's pointed out in this passage is that we thought He was afflicted by God instead of that He did this for us. If my image of Jesus is one of a Savior that floated through life seemingly unscathed by the difficulties of the world because He was God I will miss His humanity. If Jesus was not fully human than how can He understand what I have been through. I must have my mind renewed to the truth of His humanity and His total identification with the sin infested, pain-filled, and troubled humanity that you and I live in. When I see that Jesus experienced what I have experienced than I receive the validation my heart has been looking for then I can give Him my griefs, sorrows, and pains. The amazing thing is that God will allow us to try to comfort ourselves unsuccessfully. What does all this have to do with family? We are most likely hurt in our intimate relationships, as well as blessed, so families are a place where we can heal. I recently challenged someone to see their family from the perspective of Heaven, since according to Ephesians 2:6 we are seated with Him in heavenly places in Christ. Also Jesus encourages us to release Heaven into earth in the Lord's prayer. My friend began to see his family restored, reconciled, and healed. He just sent me an email that he is seeing miraculous changes in his family. Looking at our families from the world's perspective can lead us to believe the barriers and walls will never be overcome but this is a perspective without the finished work of Christ. I pray you will get Heaven's perspective because this is where the Will of God is done perfectly.

In His Grace,
Bret

You have Divine Favor

There are always so many challenges in life, it seems that they are unending yet the finished work of Christ is enough for our victory. As we were praying over potential buildings to move ELM into in the future the Lord began to open my eyes about some verses in Scripture. I realized that we need favor, favor opens doors that men can't open and it is supernatural. I remember when we adopted my son Joshua how the Lord had revealed the power of His Favor. We were amazed as barrier after barrier were overcome by the power of the Lord's favor released through faith-filled prayers (at times mustard seed size). So as the Lord quickened to my spirit the verses in Proverbs 3:4-6, "So you will find favor and good repute In the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." This is a wonderful few verses that had been prayed over me many years back, yet I struggled with a inner ache of was I really trusting in the Lord with all my heart because this was the condition to receiving Divine Favor. It seemed if I was totally honest with myself and God that I didn't trust Him with all my heart even though I had the desire. This is what I saw if I was to look at these verses through the Old Covenant (Law) but through the New Covenant (finished work of Christ) it comes alive. Jesus did trust in the Lord with all His heart and thus fulfilled the condition to receive Divine Favor, as our representantive (human being) in the New Covenant with God we were then given the result by God putting us "in Christ". In other words in a Covenant relationship you share with another party everything you have, God has not withheld from us so we are fellow heirs with Christ (Romans 8:17). This means that through Christ God has given me Divine Favor and faith in what Christ has done for me unlocks this promise in my life. Praise God! This makes sense when almost a year ago I was asking the Lord for favor, He stopped me and said "Why do you pray for what I have already given you?". The definition for Grace is unmerited favor, if it was merited I would have had to earn it but the Divine Favor by being "in Christ" is Grace. This is all wonderful but I can put pressure on myself to "have faith", yet Galatians 2:20 tells us that we live by the faith "of the Son of God". It isn't even my faith but faith given to me as a gift from Jesus. Wow! I now see that I have a right to Divine Favor, not because I am special in my own ability or estimation but because of the Grace of God. I pray that you would agree that God has given you favor and walk in it. Favor can open amazing doors, put you before important people, and give solutions that no one else has. It is the right of every believer, yet the Enemy has done a good job of deceiving us into believing we have to earn it through our right and holy living (Old Covenant-Law).

In His Grace,
Bret

God's Desire

I am not leaving the subject of God's redemption of the family, this is just a look into what God has put on my heart lately. Our church recently entered a season of 40 days of consecration (originally centered on a form of Nazirite vow) and a day of waiting on the Lord as part of this season. As I sat and listened to worship music and just enjoyed the presence of the Lord I was directed by the Spirit to look at the John's vision of the returning Jesus in Revelation 1. Instead of an attempt to increase my desire for God, the Spirit was directing me to look at God's desire for me through the eyes of our returning King (Jesus). The picture in Revelation 1 is not one of a stern, judgmental, or disappointed Jesus but one of eyes aflame with desire for His Bride. I thought how can Jesus have this desire for His bride (me included), when we the Body are such a mess. The Spirit directed me to Ephesians 2 where Paul recounts our state of death, hopelessness, and total disobedience (following Satan rather than God). Right in the middle of the chapter God's desire explodes onto the scene, But God so rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us.... (Ephesians 2:4). In the next verse Paul again restates our condition of death (without life-giving desire). This began a journey of understanding why did God want me to focus on His desire for me, rather than what I want to do for Him. I know see that any desire that originates with me and not with God is desire that ends in death (unfulfilled and misdirected). One author said (Bill Johnson) "Probing your heart to see if you love God enough is always a dead end." It was God who brought us back to life, gave us a desire for Him, caused us to hear His voice, put His Spirit within us, and leads us to know Him. I believe the radical announcement of the New Covenant is that we bring nothing to the table and God brings everything "in Christ". As I see God's passionate desire for me then I respond (come to life), trying to create a desire for God to follow Him, know Him better, or even give more of my life to Him only ends in defeat and failure. Also none of my efforts at vigorous self-improvement or spiritual discipline make me attractive to God, He desires me because of who He is (God is love). Also in Ephesians 2:10 I am told that I am God's workmanship, I have told God that He has a big project on His hands. I have believed the lie from childhood that I needed to make myself acceptable and thus somehow worthy of love. It is such freedom to not have to work on myself or make myself pure. It is only through the finished work of Christ that Paul says about me "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come." (2 Corinthians 5:17) If I agree with the Word of God I am a New Creature already changed, not my own project to be tweaked, ridiculed, chastised, then I can give up on endless thoughts and efforts to try to change me. I heard one person say we don't need a change, we need a transformation. Transformation is when our very nature is made new, only God could do that through the finished work of Jesus Christ. In our society we are very image-focused, I believe the desire to transform our image is from God but Satan offers the external counterfeit to the authentic (who we are "in Christ"). It is so amazing that a God that knows everything about me, absolutely declares His love for me and welcomes me home as a son. I pray Holy Spirit you would lead me into the truth of this every day of my life, may I live as His beloved child. Join me in soaring with Our Father.

In Christ,
Bret Rutland

Forgiveness and Family

As I look to see that I have not written in a while I must apologize. We have recently had 8 students involved in our 4 week Advanced Training, I found myself overwhelmed with clients and needing a rest. On Tuesday as I sat in discussion about compassion, forgiveness, and judgements I was reminded by the Lord of the importance of forgiveness. As I met with several clients the Spirit immediately showed me the importance of them letting go of judgments to find freedom. We are told throughout our Christian lives that we are forgiven and then to forgive but we are often not shown how to walk this road. Especially if I have been in a legalistic church the expectation is that of course I would just forgive and who should be taught. The truth I find is that while many know they need to forgive somewhere deep inside they have not had a revelation by the Spirit of God on how to forgive so they stay trapped in a prison of emotional pain. First we must get a revelation of how much we have been forgiven, in Colossians 2:14 it says record of our sins was nailed to the cross and taken away. In Jesus' parable of the king taking an account He describes one slave owing 10,000 talents (which if you do the math comes out to be $120 billion in today's dollars). Something that is rather confusing about forgiveness is that it is not forgiving a person as it is "sending away" (the original greek word) the debt that was incurred. In other words when someone hurts us (sinnning against us) we hold a debt against them because our sense of justice has been violated. If I attempt to forgive them but do not release them of the debt then I just remain in bondage to the debt. When the king in the parable took an account, Jesus was showing us in order to forgive we must see what the debt is (what we believe the person owes us for hurting us). We are commanded under the New Covenant of Grace to forgive in many places in the Word but we must understand that any command given in the New Covenant can only be followed through by the power of the Holy Spirit working within us. In other words if we have not received a revelation of how to walk New Covenant forgiveness we will appeal to our fleshly resources which won't work. If I have tried to forgive someone unsuccessfully (meaning I still feel anger or hurt when I think of them) then I have not had New Covenant forgiveness revealed to me. A collegue in ministry had a revelation of Matthew 7:1-2 on Judgements and why Jesus would say "Do not judge...". This revelation was that when we are hurt by another person we naturally judge them for how they have hurt us, which then produces anger and this keeps us connected to the person in a damaging way through sin/judgement. Since judgements are a legal perspective, we in escense set the person up as guilty in our court of law (with us as the judge). I have walked many clients through the courtroom in their mind (just picturing a courtroom) to have them see the judgements they have made in their hearts and then release them. It is the fact that we are forgiven that empowers us to forgive and there are many scriptures tying our forgiveness of others to receiving God's forgiveness of us. How does this relate to the family? We are hurt most deeply in intimate relationships, so thus there is a great need to have a working model of forgiveness in our families. Denying the hurts that have occurred in a family is what leads to continued broken relationships in the future. As my colleague shared that 60% of his one on one ministry is dealing with forgiveness I began to sense the Lord nudging me to make this more functional in my own life and family. The Lord then helped me walk through some self-judgements and other judgements that had been hidden. I am now seeking the Lord on how to teach my kids and family a working model of New Covenant forgiveness. Forgiveness is a powerful part of walking in freedom under the New Covenant. I pray the Lord would lead you in forgiving those debts/judgements that have hindered your freedom.

In His Peace,
Bret Rutland